Men's Love Incompetence, Women's Self-Offering

Whether a man can love you consistently—most women already know in their hearts. If a man once loved you but has started to treat you coldly, disappoint you, or even shift his affection elsewhere, it reflects his inability to manage his own aggression or the darkness within him. That darkness blocks the channel of his love, leaving him incapable of sustaining his love for you. A man who is capable of taming his inner darkness, as long as he feels love for you at the beginning, will have the ability to maintain that feeling of love over time.

If he says to you, "You need to be emotionally independent, don't be so emotionally dependent on me, don't revolve around me like the earth around the sun," what he is really saying (though he would never say it outright in reality because he isn't even aware of it) is: "I am a weak, powerless biological male, not an emotionally mature man. Because I cannot master the darkness inside me, cannot transform my aggression into the masculine strength of protection and care for you, I am unable to sustain my love for you. So you figure it out yourself."

From the moment such a rift appears, you know: this man cannot control his evil, and the demon therefore controls him at every turn. If you continue to engage with him, you will be abused or hurt by the demon that controls him.

I have never advocated those techniques about how to re-attract a man, how to win him back, how to make him unable to leave you—such as "you must love yourself first," "you must be independent first," and so on. Building your career is about developing your own strength; it has nothing to do with men. The kind of man who requires you to use techniques is often the love-incompetent man I described earlier—someone unable to master his own aggression. His love is fleeting and unstable. For such a man, you need to weigh carefully whether anything that cannot directly exchange your love for his love is worth it.

You might say with your lips that it's not worth it, but everything you do shows that you think it is. You may fantasize about rekindling his love with your own love or with techniques. But don't forget: you are facing a man who can be seized by a demon at any moment. All the emotions you invest (and the techniques you use, because the motivation behind those techniques is still your love) are likely to be received by the demon that controls him, becoming a self-offering to that demon.

Yet there are still women who, even knowing that all their feelings for such a man are offerings to a demon, choose to continue doing so.

This is not self-sacrifice for love. This is falling in love with the very act of offering oneself to the demon. In reality, this manifests as constantly being hurt by a man yet endlessly hoping for his love, only to be hurt again—this is self-inflicted abuse.

In truth, it is a path to death. She uses the demon's hand to kill herself. In mild cases, it is psychological destruction; in severe cases, even her body is destroyed by her own hand. The psychological drive behind this is her death instinct / aggressive instinct.

It stems from the fact that since childhood, she has not been accustomed to directing her aggression outward, but rather turning it against herself. When she is hurt by a man, her anger is not primarily directed at him, but at herself. The only way she can release that anger is through self-torture and self-destruction. She offers herself to the demon, and the demon also represents the projection of her inner rage. She uses the demon's hand to achieve her own self-annihilation. ❀